Lemony Snicket Appreciation Post (Part 1)

It is always cruel to laugh at people, of course, although sometimes if they are wearing an ugly hat it is hard to control yourself.
— Lemony Snicket

Miracles are like meatballs, because nobody can exactly agree on what they are made of, where they come from, or how often they appear.
— Lemony Snicket, The Carnivorous Carnival

Everyone, at some point in their lives, wakes up in the middle of the night with the feeling that they are all alone in the world, and that nobody loves them now and that nobody will ever love them, and that they will never have a decent night’s sleep again and will spend their lives wandering blearily around a loveless landscape, hoping desperately that their circumstances will improve, but suspecting, in their heart of hearts, that they will remain unloved forever. The best thing to do in these circumstances is to wake somebody else up, so that they can feel this way, too.
— Lemony Snicket

The Snow Scouts

It is one of life’s bitterest truths that bedtime so often arrives just when things are really getting interesting.
— Lemony Snicket, The Grim Grotto

Duncan and Isadora Quagmire

Taking one’s chances is like taking a bath, because sometimes you end up feeling warm and comfortable, and sometimes there is something terrible lurking around that you cannot see until it is too late and you can do nothing else but scream and cling to a plastic duck.
— Lemony Snicket